Abundant Living Becomes a Reality

A year ago, I found myself at a major crossroads in my faith journey.  I began to seriously entertain life questions that I had been grappling with for years.  Why wasn’t the promise of abundant living found in the Bible a living reality to me?  Was it Biblically correct to embrace faith-filled suffering?  If so, could my suffering prove to be God’s “BLUEPRINT” for me to develop a deeper sense of felt joy?  Is redemption revealed through suffering?

Revelation of God’s Goodness

Captivated by the very possibility that God could bring about a depth of joy through my suffering, I began to feel comforted.  A newly discovered sense of HOPE was taking root in my heart.  Gradually, my human will was being postured to “KNOWING” what Father God had in store for my life.  Never once did I fathom that my decision to fully surrender my will to His blueprint, could lead to a revelation of the Goodness of God! 

Hoping Without Knowing

I began my intentional journey of not knowing, but hoping, by yielding my control to understand.  I practiced being gracious to myself as the process of surrender beckoned me to come closer to God.  I realized that the questions I had grappled with for so long; were actually the very longings of my soul hungering to know God as my Father.  God wants me to know Him through and through.  He is deeply concerned for me and cares immeasurably for me.  His commitment to conform me into the very likeness of His Son, Jesus Christ (Romans 8:29) is the very cry of His heart.  Knowing this leads me to the very reservoir of God’s goodness and mercy towards me.

Gaining Victory

Redemption was revealed to me when I surrendered to the unknown destination of faith my major life experiences of journeying through and gaining victory over many years of manic depression and trichotillomania (an impulse control disorder characterized by compulsive hair-pulling).  It is a true reflection of the very real and felt presence of Father God’s manifested goodness towards a once deeply broken, in spirit, me.  His goodness graces me with deep love, compassion, and empathy towards countless victims of painful childhoods.  It goes beyond my sake and comfort in life and allows me to reach others.  Through my journey God helps me to  give a voice to the voiceless victim, who longs to be released from the deep fear of exposure and rejection.

Running the Race of Life

Father God’s goodness galvanized my understanding of what it means to be His beloved daughter.  It frees me of my own limited human comprehension of a father’s love shown to his biological daughter.  God’s goodness teaches me the inward truth that I too, with all my human frailties, am forever dependent on the gift of free-flowing Grace of His heart. It is available to assist me when I fall short of drawing life and courage from being in His Presence.  As I embrace that Grace, I am, in part, mastering His art of defining the joy that was set before Him, in the aftermath of His death on the Cross, for you and I.  In joy and in suffering, I can now run the race of life with confidence.  “I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus.” (Philippians 3:14 NIV).  

Celebrating the Journey

With great expectancy in my “faith journey,” I no longer view my life as a moment by moment sorting through of painful memories, dead promises, and endless looping questions. I am on an infinite symbolic journey on Highway Psalm 27, always keeping my mind’s eye on Exit v.13. This way, despite every road I have traveled down, I can now celebrate my life journey, and travel free of the cares of this life. With a full heart I say: “I am still confident of this: I will see the goodness of the LORD in the land of the living.” (Psalm 27:13 NIV). 

To comment click HERE. 

Maryann L. Hayles is the Co-founder and Managing Partner, Inner Healing for The Center for Emotional and Spiritual Development - Website is www.emotionalspiritualcenter.org. Email address is mhayles@emotionalspiritualcenter.org.  She oversees the Emotional and Spiritual Health segment for Christ Church Women's Ministry.  Maryann is a passionate follower of the lover of her soul - Jesus Christ and delights in seeing broken people healed, restored and fulfill their God-given destiny. She is the proud wife, of 11 years, to Rupert A. Hayles, Jr.

photo credit: paul bica via photopincc

Susanne Says - How to Revolutionize Your Relationship with Your Teenager

One of the best strategies for working with teenagers is to move in the opposite spirit, which means doing the opposite of what seems natural. Basically, this is a technique that disarms the stubborn or strong-willed person by agreeing with them. Sometimes it is as simple as saying, "Oh, yes, I see what you mean," after the teen delivers a criticism or harsh remark. This switches up the dynamic in the relationship and gives both parties a chance to restart from a more positive position.

What does this look like in real life?

One of my teenagers was very angry at me because there was a Friday night event his friends were going to and he wasn't allowed to go. (It was more than a decade ago. So I don't remember why he wasn't allowed to go exactly but it was probably a type of event my husband and I didn't approve of.) It was Saturday afternoon and I was returning home from my office. My then-15-year-old son was ready for a fight. He came rushing in to yell at me about how outrageous it was that he missed the night out. I took a deep breath…I had never seen him so willing to express his anger at me. I pulled out a chair and sat down and just listened. It seriously disarmed him. He didn't expect that reaction from me.

Most likely, my son expected me either to yell back, warn him not to be disrespectful, or go somewhere until he composed himself…all realistic expectations. But this day somehow the Holy Spirit had prepared me to move in the opposite spirit.

The result of moving in the opposite spirit

My son totally changed his approach when he saw he had my full attention. He then told me how he felt about being deprived of something he really wanted to do. Yes, he was mad, but mostly he was disappointed and felt powerless that we would withhold that opportunity from him. He assumed we knew how much it meant to him. Of course, that's my summary of his thoughts and feelings that day. It was a pretty emotional exchange.

THE GOAL

My son’s anger was diffused and he had a chance to talk about important feelings while still feeling them. Things didn't always go so smoothly at our house for sure. But I learned a valuable lesson: We need to make a distinction between anger and disrespect. As parents we shouldn't allow disrespect, but we can permit and even encourage expression of feelings. What's the difference?  Anger is expressed in "I" statements and disrespect is more character assassination, bullying, name-calling, and the like. A young person may start off in disrespect and be able to switch to respect because his/her feelings are being validated.

Sometimes kids, strong-willed or otherwise, just need a chance to be who they are without reprisal or parental injunctions like: "Don't you raise your voice to me" or " You know what's going to happen if you continue talk to me like that!"  Moving in the opposite spirit is doing the unexpected. If someone is being superior or prideful, take the one-down position of humility. If someone is being cranky or cantankerous you could be unabashedly kind or understanding. If someone is being critical, join with them, "Hey, I resemble that remark."

A picture of moving in the opposite spirit

Think about it this way. Imagine you're at a department store and feeling very angry and entitled because the clerk is taking way too long and you're not remembering your early morning moments with The Lord. Someone notices you and offers to let you go in front of them, saying something very kind and understanding and NOT judging you. It's totally disarming. It helps you own your "stuff."  Your anger fades and you may even have a complete emotional reversal. Why?  Is it because someone noticed your plight and saw things from your perspective and empathized with you?

Unless you're inherently very entitled, you know you don't deserve the "go to the head of the line" treatment. It exposes your character flaw to yourself. This is the side of God's learning curve we all so enjoy. What has happened here?  Someone has shown me acceptance during a time I least deserve it. I'm caught in the act of being myself. Yet, at the same time, I'm not being disapproved of but rather I'm being shown grace and favor. This is the part of God's training camp where our growth and maturation are expedited. Ah, yes, much more fruitful than lecturing and sermonizing.

We need to remember this application when our kids are getting on our last nerve. It has been said that our kids need our love the most when they least deserve it! That's also true of us and our relationships with The Lord and our friends and spouses, too.

The Irresistible Force paradox

What happens when an unstoppable force meets an immovable object?  Parenting strong-willed or angry kids can feel like that age-old physics paradox. Moving in the opposite spirit sidesteps that dilemma by deferring to the immovable force coming at me and being in control of myself. As a parent, I know that having control over my emotions is the only way to ensure a good outcome. We're supposed to be in control but not controlling! What's the difference? When we're controlling, we don't permit scary feelings such as anger, hostility, disappointment from our kids, and we don't permit them to be separate from us. (“We'll tell you how to feel, act, etc.”)

Application

As parents we have many opportunities to provide experiences that mature our kids. I was a no-nonsense kind of parent when it came to homework, chores, routines, and the like, but I tried to permit a lot of dialogue about other things.

Next time one of your kids is indignant about a boundary or structure your family has set up, step aside! Pull up a chair and listen. Don't argue. Restate what they say; it's very validating. See what happens. Obviously, every scenario in family life doesn't offer an opportunity for moving in the opposite spirit. But maybe, just maybe, when you do move in the opposite spirit, you might find a lightening of tensions and more joy and understanding being generated around the dinner table or on long car rides. You truly have nothing to lose. “If we always do what we've always done, we're always going to get what we've always gotten.” (Henry Ford)

Is there a Biblical foundation for this?

The Holy Spirit is always moving in the opposite spirit. Isaiah 61 shows us that He gives us beauty for ashes, joy for our sadness, and the garments of praise for depression. The prayer of St. Francis of Assisi is another example of moving in the opposite spirit. The Kingdom of Heaven is truly opposite from the world we're living in. So why not operate from the kingdom in which we have true citizenship. (Eph. 4:20-22).

Moving in the opposite spirit can find a place in many of our relationship dynamics. (It is the crux of good customer relations.) Be creative! Seek the Lord for ways to apply the principle of moving in the opposite spirit with your kids, your colleagues, neighbors, and family. You may be very surprised to see how THE opposite spirit, the Holy Spirit, might intervene in one of the aspects of your daily grind and bring about an outcome that could only be from above!

Susanne Ciancio, LPC, is a Licensed Professional Christian Counselor. She has been serving the Christian community as a professional Christian counselor in Essex county and the surrounding area since 1986. Beyond her private practice in West Orange, NJ she is involved in teaching, consulting, and pastoral supervision in various churches in the area. Click here for Susanne's website. 

EDITORS NOTE: While Susanne can’t answer specific counseling-related questions, she welcomes your thoughts, comments, and suggestions about what kinds of topics you’d like to see addressed here at Circles of Faith. Click here to contact us.

photo credit: Shavar Ross via photopincc

Five Decades at the Potter’s Wheel

2013 marks my 50th year of life. I am so excited. I always take note of entering into new decades; there is something very special about that to me.

Before New Year’s and in preparation for this golden year, I wanted to do some “decluttering” and reorganizing, so I’d be unencumbered by the stuff that just builds up over time. I’ve done this over the years, but this time was different.

In the midst of throwing out old things that were no longer needed and organizing things, I sat for a while, pouring over my memories of decades past, through pictures, letters, and journals. As I looked back over my life (and this is truly why I love getting older), I was simply amazed by how God, the Potter, so carefully has been molding me on His wheel as the years turned.

Molded for Empathy

In the first decade, He shaped my empathy for others. Only God could use my chaotic childhood experiences that were soaked in a potent, toxic mix of addiction and mental illness, to dig a deep well of empathy within me. It’s a well that I have drawn on time and time again to serve others in their time of need.

Molded for Purpose

In my teens, He shaped my determination and perseverance to stay the course and get to the goal. By the grace of God, I escaped some of the vestiges of family dysfunction, and bypassed destructive peer pressure because His firm hand kept pushing me toward purpose.

Molded for His Will

In my 20s and 30s, He walked me through some dark valleys. I believe His hand was upon me. I also know He had to pry open my hand, so I’d relinquish my own will for His will for my life.

Through the deaths of both my parents, my husband’s devastating departure, and my own near death, He added levels of faith and belief that I didn’t know were possible. I can truly say with assurance that weeping may endure for a night but joy comes in the morning.

Molded for Sacrifice

In my 40s He honed my courage to use my gifts and my voice to address leaders and speak the truth and the courage to stay true and COMMITTED to fulfilling my unique calling, in season and out of season. He gave me a fuller understanding of Romans 12:1 (should use quote), what it means to be a living sacrifice.

And now, here I am, entering my 50th year and God continues to mold me. His work is not close to being finished, but I can honestly tell you that He’s given me what I need to go to the places He calls me to go to, to take the risks He asks me to take, to stay committed to the tasks He assigns…no matter what. And to truly follow Jesus…no matter what. In 50 years, I’ve learned to follow Jesus—THAT IS TRULY LIVING.

On New Year’s I looked back over my life, and reflected on how the Master Potter has taken such great care to prepare His disciple. I just have to give Him praise.

As you look back, how has the Master Potter taken care of you over the years? Let us know HERE.

For the past 25 years Karen Proctor has defined herself by two words, Chelsea’s mom. One of her greatest joys in life is to be her mother and to have a role in helping her to blossom as a grown up human. She spent many years as a senior public affairs/social responsibility executive in the radio, cable television, sports and publishing industries. Her ministry experience includes leading youth ministry for the past 14 years at her local church. She heart's desire in life is provide people with opportunities to learn and grow. 

Karen is founder of Pala Miracle and publisher of freshzoe.com. She uses that space to focus on living a fresh life; one that is fully about serving God and serving others. “In His service” is her place of real joy.

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She Speaks - A Speakers and Writers Conference

She Speaks - A Speakers and Writers Conference From Proverbs 31 Ministries

Date: July 25-27, 2013

Registration: Open now and filling up fast!

We’ve had a few posts here on Circles Of Faith from the awesome women of Proverbs 31 Ministries, including Karen Ehman, Tracie Miles, Lynn Cowell, and just in the past few days, Amy Carroll. So I figured it was time to share just one of the fabulous opportunities Proverbs 31 provides. It’s their informative, instructional, applicable, inspiring annual She Speaks, Speakers and Writers Conference.

Two summers ago, I dared to venture out to the Proverbs 31 She Speaks Conference…ALONE!

I had never traveled anywhere alone and stayed alone for several days. I’m a girlfriends’ girlfriend. I love traveling with a pack. I love having one of my birth or God sisters with me at times like this. I mean how much fun to prepare and plan, board the plane with breathless anticipation. To set down in a lovely foreign land (well from NJ to NC…it was new territory to me!) wide-eyed and bushy tailed ready to experience together a living, learning adventure. Then to return each night to our cozy little hotel room, giddy with fun and fellowship to share.

Well, my first She Speaks Conference wasn’t exactly like this, since I was…ALONE!

As it happened, I had been trying to get to the She Speaks Conference for a couple of years with a couple of interested gal pals. In fact, for my 50th birthday, my beloved friends, knowing the desire of my heart was to attend this conference, collected money to help send me on my way. I was just waiting till one of my friends could come along. But it had been two years and I was itching to go!

So, with great trepidation and nerves akimbo, I registered myself for She Speaks.

Yes, terror mixed with the excitement of actually doing this very big thing…ALONE!

I felt certain I was to go. And so off I went. The flight (I have some fear of flying) was smooth sailing. The shuttle was awaiting and quickly filled up with a spirited bunch of women, most of whom were exhausted from the pressures of leaving family behind and pulling it all together on the home front. We were mostly new to the conference. All of us were just silly with eagerness, chatting, exchanging stories, hopes, and plans, and getting to know one another in our moving bubble.

And then we arrived! It was actually one night before the Pre-Conference began; a great opportunity to relax and catch my breath before the opening of She Speaks.

I had already made a fast friend…

And so we agreed to grab a quick bite and go for a pool walk. Yes, we donned our bathing suits, jumped in the pool, and began walking laps as we shared like old friends do…though we had just met each other. For me, my new buddy was a sign that I was going to be just fine and this conference was going to be a girlfriend getaway and so much more, even though I was there…ALONE!

The next morning, I checked in to the Pre-Conference Session.

I was outfitted with my new conference tote and an awesome book by Renee Swope, A Confident Heart . I felt the book was a gift from God, since there was one of several book choices included in each bag, and this seemed perfectly chosen for me.

The journey of learning, connecting, worshipping, sharing, laughing, crying continued for three days. I was in the right place at the right time, meeting all kinds of amazing women I wouldn’t have met had I been traveling with others. The worship was rich. The keynotes were moving and left lasting impact.

I remember Lysa TerKeurst’s (keynote was Let God Chisel).Karen Ehman put on a hysterical skit on comparison (so relatable for comparison queens like me). Renee Swope’s  testimony was powerful and moving. Oh and it was there that I first encountered Ann Voskamp, author of the life-changing One Thousand Gifts: A Dare to Live Fully Right Where You Are . I met the engaging and delightful Amy Carroll and signed up for some continuing ed, so to speak, through the equipping Next Step Speakers Services . I’ve since enjoyed Message Development coaching through Next Step from Karen Ehman and a recent eye-opening Group Service conference call, Writing a Bang-Up Book Proposal, also with Karen.

There were excellent workshops on marketing, writing, speaking, publishing, platform, and more. I was part of a Speakers Coaching Group (very intimidating, but I’m glad I did it!). And I even met with a couple of publishers to share my book proposal.

From beginning to end, I was so delighted to be at She Speaks. The friends I met, words spoken, lessons learned, challenges met…well it was all beyond what I could’ve asked or imagined.

If you want to sharpen your writing skills and hone your speaking message, enjoy lots of good girlfriend time (even if you’re alone!), be refreshed, equipped, and inspired, I’d say She Speaks is for you. Find out more here http://shespeaksconference.com/shespeaks/ .

And if you decide to go, please let me know. I’m doing my best to make my way there again this summer…this time with Circles of Faith Co-Founder, Managing Editor, and Friend Kimberly Amici. Hope to see you there!

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Elise has been married for 28 years and is mom to four mostly grown girls. She is a writer, editor, writing coach, and blogger. She believes we all have stories that matter--big life bios and small meaningful moments. Elise believes our stories are a reflection of God’s glory and are meant to be shared. They have the power to inform, reform, and transform. She loves God, familly, friends...and really likes travel!

Disclosure: This post contains affiliate links.

40-Day Prayer Challenge - Day 11

Here is a sample of what we are doing during the 40-Day Prayer Challenge. It's not too late to join us. 

There are two ways you can walk with us on this 40-Day Prayer Journey: Subscribe to 40-Day Prayer Challenge by Email (Please note this is a different subscription list from our regular posts.) Like us on Facebook.

Day 11 First Class Notifier (Based on Day 11 in Draw the Circle)

I recently took a photography class. It was a four-week course that taught us the basics of using a DSLR camera. In the third class we learned about the six elements of design: line, shape, form, texture, pattern, and color. The instructor told us that the more often we look for these things in our surroundings the more we will notice them. This is because of our Reticular Activating System. It’s the RAS that determines what we notice and what we do not. I was excited to know that this applies to prayer as well. 

When you pray you start noticing providence, divine appointments, and answered prayers in unexpected places. 

There are times when we can't see past those things that are heavily weighing on us. Sometimes we can't see past the dishes our sink, the laundry in our hampers, or our to-do list. Prayer lengthens our depth of field*. As we cultivate a habit of prayer we develop our sixth sense - a Holy Spirit enabled perception.

I don't know about you but I don't want to miss a thing!

Dear Lord, I know you hear my prayers.  Open my eyes and help me to perceive your hand in __________________________. Help me to notice how you are working in this situation. I don’t want to miss what you are doing in response to my prayers and in my life…

*Depth of field - the amount of distance between the nearest and farthest objects that appear in focus in a photograph. Want to learn more? Check it out here. 

This post is a part of the 40-Day Prayer Challenge at Circles of Faith. We are following along with Draw the Circle: The 40 Day Prayer Challengeby Mark Batterson. To read more about it CLICK HERE. 

About the author - Kimberly Amici, co-founder of Circles of Faith, is passionate about prayer and excited to share this journey with you. 

Disclosure: This post contains affiliate links.

photo credit: YLegrand via photopincc

Greater - Book Review

Greater: Dream Bigger. Start Smaller. Ignite God's Vision for Your Life. By Steven Furtick - Founder and Lead Pastor of Elevation Church, one of the fastest growing churches in the country and author of the bestseller Sun Stand Still.

Published by Multnomah, Nonfiction, 205 Pages with Discussion Questions

If you dream of doing greater things…or wonder about your greater purpose…or just need some inspiration for continuing to aim for more, Greater is a book for you.

Struck by the outpouring of love and regard for Steve Jobs after his death was reported, author Steven Furtick tweets, “What a life.” Jobs’ death draws Furtick to this scripture:

I tell you the truth, anyone who has faith in me will do what I have been doing. He will do even greater things than these, because I am going to the Father.  John 14:12

Furtick realizes he’s nowhere near being the man of God he wants to be.

From this point, Greater takes us on a personal journey of discovering just what it means to be greater, through the biblical journey of the prophet Elisha, found in 1 Kings 19 – 2 Kings. Elisha was working hard, plowing his fields, when God sent the prophet Elijah to call him to a greater thing—becoming the great prophet Elijah’s successor.

What was required of Elisha is required of us if we desire to be greater.

Some of the requirements include:

1. Burning the plow—What do you have to leave behind to move forward?

2. Digging ditches—Start, even if it’s a seemingly small start…Act, talk, pray, be prepared.

3. Work with what you’ve got and give up the “if only.”

4. Believe that God never wastes anything, even setbacks and suffering.

5. Watch out for pride.

6. Renew your determination daily.

7. Trust what God says about you, “What matters is what my Father sees in me and what He says about me.”

8. “Strike” (Read Greater to find out what this means…)

From the beginning, Furtick draws a clear distinction between being greater than Jesus and greater with Him. “He’s calling us to be greater with Him through His Spirit within us.”

A couple of things that stop us from saying yes to greater is:

1. We don’t think big enough.

2. We don’t start small enough.

In the back of the book there are Group Discussion Questions, but you don’t need a group to discuss them. If your reading this book on your own, a journal might come in handy. The questions simply and clearly reinforce the message of each chapter, while offering a “Start Small” step. With a little imagination, you can translate the group step to a personal step, which I highly recommend!

Furtick has a wonderful way with words that jolts us into understanding.

Among my favorites are comfortable complacency, miserable mediocrity, lesser loser life, Captain Awesomesauce. His style is engaging and down to earth. And he uses some excellent real-life stories to demonstrate the path to a greater life.

One of the stories I appreciated most was when Furtick tries to teach his son Elijah how to ride a two-wheeler. The story starts with Dad huffing and puffing as he takes the training wheels off the bike with difficulty. And ends with Elijah not having much success with learning to ride. However, an AhHa moment comes when Elijah asks his dad if he will show him how to preach. Now that’s something Furtick, a pastor of a mega church, can do.

Furtick shares the value of letting go of our limitations and doing the best we can with what we’ve been given. The greater life “…starts where you are. You have everything you need to do all that God is calling you to do right now.”

I am in the midst of many transitions. And with my cofounder, Kimberly, we’ve just started Circles Of Faith. Greater was just the reinforcement I needed to keep moving forward. Greater offers excellent teaching, biblical basis, and practical steps to take toward living the greater life every one of us is called to by God.

To fnd out more about the author Steven Furtick and Elevation Church you can visit their website. 

To comment on the book review CLICK HERE.

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Elise has been married for 28 years and is mom to four mostly grown girls. She is a writer, editor, writing coach, and blogger. She believes we all have stories that matter--big life bios and small meaningful moments. Elise believes our stories are a reflection of God’s glory and are meant to be shared. They have the power to inform, reform, and transform. She loves God, familly, friends...and really likes travel!

Eyes Wide Open to Wisdom

I typically wear many, many hats in the span of a week.

I am a prayer group leader (and participant), boot camper, chef, Girl Scout leader, Lego League coach, Gifted and Talented Parent Representative, and school volunteer. That does not even include the standing responsibilities of wife, mom, daughter, friend, car pool driver, household manager, calendar keeper, block party organizer, and sports scheduler! Every day I am required to use both my “Adult“ wisdom and “Mommy” wisdom. And yes, I think they can be separate. On a great day – they are one in the same. 

It was on one particular week when our community was going through a time of loss that I truly saw God’s gift of wisdom in my life with my eyes wide open.

Our priest gave a sermon on wisdom and it struck a chord.  As I thought about what was being said, I was able to recognize the wisdom from God operating at various times of my life. I recalled various people who I have come across that have been given wisdom as well. 1 Corinthians 12:4-11 says

There are different kinds of gifts, but the same Spiritdistributes them.There are different kinds of service, but the same Lord.There are different kinds of working, but in all of them and in everyoneit is the same Godat work.Now to each one the manifestation of the Spirit is given for the common good.To one there is given through the Spirit a message of wisdom,to another a message of knowledgeby means of the same Spirit,to another faithby the same Spirit, to another gifts of healingby that one Spirit,to another miraculous powers,to another prophecy,to another distinguishing between spirits,to another speaking in different kinds of tongues,and to still another the interpretation of tongues.All these are the work of one and the same Spirit,and he distributes them to each one, just as he determines.

I’m relishing the blessing of being a stay-at-home parent, even amidst the chaos of little ones (and big ones). I chose to be at home and am very thankful that I can be. All my previous paid jobs, from a pizza maker to a small law firm manager to a human resource manager in advertising had a purpose. These positions and the people encountered along the way help assemble and build my talents of time management, my people skills, and my love for community, all of which further enhance my time as a stay-at-home parent.

There were days, and there will be many more, that I feel  I am not being utilized to the best of my ability. 

On those days in my journey I can know that God has me right where he wants me. I can also be encouraged by the hope that:

• ·      One or more of my car pool charges will feel secure that I’m always going to be on time.
• ·      My Girl Scouts will be so comfortable with me that they’ll trust me enough to share an issue that they’re having at school.
• ·      My children’s friends will take comfort in me if hurt at a practice that their parent was not able to attend.
• ·      My children know that someone is always waiting for them at home and ready to hear, heal, and feed them upon arrival.
• ·      My efforts in community service will inspire someone to make a difference – small or large.
• ·      As a Home and School representative I will make a difference in a student’s life.
• ·      My husband, children, parents, and friends know that I pray for them often and do my best to serve each one.

Yes, I am able to see that wisdom is prevailing in my life and I’m thankful for it through and through. We all want the best for our families and through the wisdom of God; it can be achieved.

No matter what you do, it matters, so get on out there and do what you do best.

What do you do for others that you think matters most?

NOTE: let me not offend any working parent whether you are there by choice or need.  I find what you do remarkable. And I know we are all capable of loving and serving our families greatly.

Click HERE to comment...

Jennifer Pine lives in New Jersey and is a "household manager to her husband of 15 years and two kids" – i.e., stay-at-home mom. She is passionate about teaching kids of any age to do good for others and uses the Community Service Committee at the schools as a primary forum. Jennifer tries more to be her children’s parent than their BFF, enabling them to become independent so they will be successful adults.

photo credit: Mark Mrwizard via photopincc

Not Afraid to dance…

Let them praise his name with dancing and make music to him with timbrel and harp. Psalm 149:3 (NIV)

Recently, a mentor asked me to name my fear. Ha! I am the definition of fearless, or so it seems. I cope. I do not panic. In the face of what some might view as paralyzing circumstances, I industriously move forward. There is no mystery in this forward movement; God wired me this way. I. Go. On. Going on does not mean you are not afraid; it just means that fear does not stop you. I cannot imagine being any other way.

I have not named my fear; they are legion. Among them are:

•           asking for help

•           reaching out to people I do not know

•           not being good enough

•           failing those I love

I could go on, but I won’t. I am learning to thrive in community, to rely upon others. I am beginning to consistently trust my instincts, believing that the still small voice that speaks when I am quiet is enough. More than enough.

Even for a scaredy-cat like me, there are absolutes. My desire to protect those I love vanquishes any fear I might profess; when they need me I AM THERE. Another absolute? Though I might never speak my faith to you, while you might see it in who I am or how I live, know this…

I AM NOT AFRAID TO DANCE.

Though I have danced all my life, I was consumed by the ministry of liturgical dance 10 years ago. It is the single most profound confession of my faith. It is the confession I dare not make with my mouth. It is too intimate; too close; too dear to speak. That is how I came to understand that dance is my prayer language.

Dance is my native tongue.

Ministry through dance is neither widely practiced nor well understood. It is a form of worship ministry, not performance. To the same extent that devotion leaders help us prepare the temple and the people, dancers do as well, in their way.

This is not a primer on liturgical dance, this is my story.

Liturgical dance is the place at which I meet God, unafraid. It is the moment when my desire to seek Him, to offer myself as a vessel becomes larger and more insistent than any fear. I speak it all to God when I dance.

Liturgical dance is my intimate conversation with God...

I am always amazed that I can even tolerate anyone watching...except that when I worship through dance, I am completely alone, even in a sanctuary full of people. I wish I could write what I feel, but that's just it…I could dance it for you. Explaining this connection, this experience, is beyond my capacity in this language. It’s not my primary language in speaking my faith.

I dance my prayers.

I give thanks before the altar, beside the dining room table, walking the dog, anytime, anywhere the words are not enough. When dancing your prayers, the movement is the words. I best make my offering through movement. I dance unafraid; consumed more by the need to speak my wonder, my gratitude, my pain, than anything else. It is like breathing. You do not think to breathe, you just do. Even dancing in front of a congregation, a part of me remains very much alone even in ensemble, set apart. It is intimate conversation, just the Lord and me.

I am grateful for the gift of dance--it’s my fearless place.

It allows me to express feelings, to share emotions I never articulate. It is the place where I am open. While I may be observed, the subtext is exquisitely private; mine alone. It is corporate prayer whispered in a personal prayer language expressed as movement. I dance my prayers. I affirm my surrender. I dance gratitude. I dance receipt of the gift of Grace. I say, "Thank You, Lord." I humble myself and submit to an anointing, praying that my movement releases something in a worshipper that even they cannot convey in words.

I desired a prayer language. I discovered I already had one. And I am never afraid when I speak it. I am not afraid to dance.

Rochelle Wilson blogs at Treat Me to a Feast about her life lived forward, reviewed backward, through the lens of faith. She’s a PK (Pastor’s Kid), who’s been a Baptist church musician since she was five. Always a dancer and athlete, as an adult she turned to liturgical dance to deepen her personal worship.  It worked. Rochelle laughs a lot, is married to her first love and prom date nearly 20 years ago. Together God gave them two children and a boxer who is the other love of her life, confidante, therapist, and physical trainer.

photo credit: YanivG via photopincc

Pure Charity - Giving Has Gotten Easier

Elise and I first heard about Pure Charity back in October at the Allume conference. It is one of the easiest ways to fund nonprofit projects you care about. You can even earn rewards back when you give to those in need. The best part…It’s free!

Your giving power grows simple by making everyday purchases and sharing promotions with friends. 

Here is how it works:

1. You set up a personal giving fund, which is like a charity savings account online. You can customize your charitable donation all in one place. You are able to use a debit or credit card to load this fund. That money is available for you to grant out to projects you’re passionate about. It is also immediately tax deductible.
2. Even if you don’t have money to donate, you can give by shopping through a Pure Charity rewards network with everyday purchases you already make: groceries, items for baby, clothing, travel, and pet supplies. This happened in two ways. Each retailer has a set % they have committed to donating to Pure Charity when you make purchases. You can link your debit/credit card when signing up for a giving fund. This tells the retailer where their money will be going - into your Pure Charity giving fund. Also your on-line purchases can be tracked through a browser plug-in that can be installed on your computer.
3. Share your favorite projects or promotions with your friends so
they can sign up for Pure Charity too. You receive a percentage of every purchase
they make in the Rewards Network also.

What’s so neat about Pure Charity is the way you can track the progress of the projects you are giving to in your own little “charity portfolio.”

This is great idea and helpful for someone like me who wants to give more, but is not sure where to start.  It takes the guesswork out of where and how to give. Choosing a charity is easy. A list of projects can be found here. Each one falls into one of the following categories: opportunity, water, freedom, health, food, or relief. The information for each project includes location, funding goals and even lives impacted. Once you set up your account and determine your funds allocation, you can rest assured that you are supporting the causes you care about the most on an ongoing basis.

Check out Pure Charity’s website to find out more. Also check out their blog and learn about the exciting new partnerships they are forming to make a real impact on those in need.

Kimberly is an enthusiastic and dedicated founding member of the Circles of Faith team. She is known for her creativity, strong faith, and commitment to living life with purpose and passion. Kimberly is a writer and community builder whose desire is for hearts to be healed, minds to be renewed, and women to be connected in fellowship just as God intended.

You can follow Kimberly in her journey to discovering the Sweet Spot of God’s success for her everyday life on her blog at Living in the Sweet Spot. or on twitter @kimberlyamici. Click here for her full bio.

Hearts for the Lord

Several years ago, the teaching director in a Community Bible Study I attended asked me to do an opening on Valentine’s Day.  Valentine’s Day is not always an easy day for many women, myself included.  Dashed hopes and disappointment can create an unpleasant countenance and attitude.  Envy toward those whose day has been brightened with chocolate, flowers and other delights can turn a day usually decorated in red to many long hours tainted a bitter green.  That day, I strove to lift the hearts of all women in attendance with verses affirming our Heavenly Father’s great love for us.  

 At that time, my two sons were still in school, one in middle school and one in high school.  Being a degreed (but not employed) early childhood teacher, I was known to put my creative teaching efforts into the lives of my family.  That Valentine’s morning, my husband and my sons were greeted by a joyful Valentine’s greeting, homemade placemats (heart fabric) with handcrafted heart-shaped napkins, homemade-with-love heart-shaped pancakes, a red-wrapped gift, and, candy---no kidding!  The sentiments, the cheerfulness, the gifting was not returned, however. 

My presentation to the women began with that true-to-life scenario, certain that many of the gals had experienced that same lack of gifting as well.

Possibly they allowed a spirit of disappointment, sadness, and even resentment to enter their hearts. 

In Jeremiah 17 we read that the Lord says, Cursed are those who put their trust in mere humans and turn their hearts away from the Lord.  They are like stunted shrubs in the desert, with no hope for the future.  Frankly, I have never lingered very long in an actual desert—fear of snakes and poisonous spiders and such.  But, I have dug a pit and clung to the sides of it in what the Bible, continuing in Jeremiah 17, calls a barren wilderness on the salty flats.  The influence of that well-known greeting card company and some very worldly wives, was like salt, creating in me a thirst for what those wives said they had in their marriages, what they said they had received.  Ecclesiastes 5:10 admonishes us that, Those who love money will never have enough.  How absurd to think that wealth brings true happiness!  I wasn’t really thirsting for wealth, just one measly Valentine, and, maybe, one rose---with some baby’s breath and ribbon, and perhaps some candy and---you guessed it…happiness and contentment as defined by the things of this world.  But the Lord saw my troubles and cared about the anguish of my soul (Psalm 31:7).

Jeremiah continues by reminding us blessed are those whose trust is in the Lord and have made the Lord their hope and confidence.  They are like trees planted along a riverbank, with roots deep into the water.  They are not bothered by the heat (aka those “What did you get for Valentine’s Day?” questions) or worried by long months of drought (drought as in no gifts).  Their leaves stay green (and not with envy) and they go right on producing delicious fruit (delicious fruit, made up of the fruit of the Spirit, of course!).

From Romans 5:5, We know how dearly God loves us, He has given us the Holy Spirit to fill our lives with His love.

Sometimes that’s the only love that can get us through a day –God’s love, His love for us. 

Paul wrote what we could call a lovely Valentine to his beloved Ephesians, I pray that Christ will be more and more at home in your hearts as you trust in Him.  May your roots go down deep into the soil of God’s marvelous love (Ephesians 3:19). 

As we allow our roots to permeate that deeper ground, we can find sustenance from the love of Abba, Father and can even see what great love the Father has lavished on us, that we should be called children of God! And that is what we are! (1John 3:1).  We can be encouraged by how much we are loved by our Heavenly Father in a manner far surpassing anything we can experience on this earth from another human being.

Rather than anticipate February 14 with angst because we have to endure Valentine’s Day, let us delight in how much we are loved by our Heavenly Father.  Let us use our time that day not to dwell on what we didn’t receive but rather rejoice in what we have received---the sacrificial gift of salvation given to us because of the love of the Father for us. And let us share that love with those around us who so desperately need it.  

June Jones has been praying in a Moms in Prayer group since 1996 for her two now-grown sons, Kevin and Brendan, and currently leads a College and Career group. She also serves as the NJ Prayer calendar coordinator. June works full-time in a law office but still finds the time to prepare and present the power point for her church each Sunday. She has been married to her husband, Phil, for 38 years. You will most always see her wearing a hat!

photo credit: Shandi-lee via photopincc

When a Boarder Moves Into Your Home and Into Your Hear

An engagement memento box from Chris for our 25th anniversary

Your eyes saw my unformed body; all the days ordained for me were written in your book before one of them came to be.   Psalm 139:16

We grew up, five kids, in a big old house with lots of bedrooms. Then one by one, we left our home to go to college. So for many years, our home was a place where we all came and went, regularly. Holidays and summers were times of reuniting.

One of the ways my divorced mother was able to hold onto the homestead was to rent out a room or two to a boarder. This was a common occurrence in our college town. All you really had to do was hang up a sign on the college community bulletin board and you pretty much had your pick of possible renters.

So it was no surprise when a boarder moved in shortly after I left for my senior year at Boston College.

 Mom and I would chat every couple of weeks. There were no cell phones, no texting, no personal computers or Macs, but we did have a landline house phone in our on-campus apartment (fun times!).

One evening in October, Mom called. She was full of excitement.

“Have I got a boarder for you!” Mom practically burst through the phone.

“Really? Tell me…”

“Well, he’s really cute. He’s a poet, getting his masters at Columbia. And he has the most adorable daughter. You are going to love him.”

“Hmmmm…sounds good, Mom. Guess I’ll meet him at Thanksgiving.” And our catch-up conversation continued.

I was intrigued…

Sadly, when I arrived home from BC, I found out that Chris’ dad, only 45 years old, had passed away. As a result, Chris was home only briefly, but long enough for me to see that indeed this guy was really cute and sweet…and long enough to make him a batch of cookies to bring to his grieving family.

I went back to college, more intrigued, but there really hadn’t been time to get to know Chris at all. 

Still, I definitely had a crush and my roommates were all ears as I told them about Chris the boarder. I also began writing in my journal, which was filled with prayers asking for God’s guidance. Could this guy, who just happened to live in my home, in a bedroom downstairs from my room, be the man God had in mind for me? It seemed too good to be true.

Christmas vacation came and went. Chris and I passed by one another in the hallway, but spent no time together. This was fine since I was busy living my life, reconnecting with friends, having a holly, jolly holiday.

During Spring Break, I headed down to Florida with two carloads full of BC seniors. On the way back, Easter Sunday, we all camped out at my house for one night before returning to BC. Chris and his mom stopped by and my mother invited them in for a visit.

I was so nervous and excited. My heart was in my throat, my palms were sweaty, I was flitting around like a fool!

Oh yes, I had a growing crush. There was something so innocent, so good about this guy. He was genuine and real…and I had had plenty of experience with superficial immature game-filled relationships.

I left for my last month of college life. One of my roommates said with absolute certainty, “You are going to marry that guy.”

My roommate and my mom were right…Chris and I have been together 34 years, married for over 27.

When people ask me where Chris and I met, I exclaim, “Right in my very own home.”

Some would say fate brought us together; I call it divine intervention. And I’m very thankful!

What’s your story? Where or how did you meet your spouse? Tell us HERE!

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Elise has been married for 28 years and is mom to four mostly grown girls. She is a writer, editor, writing coach, and blogger. She believes we all have stories that matter--big life bios and small meaningful moments. Elise believes our stories are a reflection of God’s glory and are meant to be shared. They have the power to inform, reform, and transform. She loves God, familly, friends...and really likes travel!

All Sons & Daughters, Season One Music Review

All Sons & Daughters, Season One

I sat and listened one morning to sweet melodies and heartfelt prayers sung by two voices in beautiful harmony as I spent my quiet time with the Lord.  

The voices belonged to David Leonard and Leslie Jordan of All Sons & Daughters.  This duo, based out of Franklin, Tennessee, began writing and leading worship songs at their home church, Journey, in 2010.  They signed with Integrity Music, a worship label, later that same year.

The music of All Sons & Daughters, categorized as indie worship, was birthed out of the heartbeat and environment of their home church, as they added words and melodies to the cries, prayers, and praise of their community.  Their songs have also become relevant to congregations outside of their Nashville suburb.  

It feels natural to sing along with All Sons & Daughters in moments of deep sorrow yet can be pleasantly enjoyed while going about the mundane activities of life.  

Their songs comprise the perfect soundtrack for this journey called “life.”

Leonard and Jordan’s voices blend beautifully with accompaniment by gentle piano, simple guitar, melodic strings, and easy rhythms. Some of their songs, such as All the Poor and Powerless, Brokenness Aside, and Reason to Sing, are honest confessions of doubt and brokenness, but also serve as a reminder of God’s promises of restoration, healing, and faithfulness.  Other songs, like Let It Shine, I Am Set Free, and All Praise to You, are proclamations of freedom found in Christ and a rally cry to worship Him.  Alive and Oh Our Lord are the most upbeat songs on the record and joyfully exclaim the life we have in our Lord.

All Sons & Daughters offer their music freely as part of their mission. 

In an age where piracy is rampant and artists hold tightly to their creation, All Sons & Daughters acknowledges that their purpose is not merely fame and fortune, but to chronicle the journey that we are on as sons and daughters of the Most High God.  This is evident, not only because of soulful words that they have set to music, but also because they make these lyrics and chord charts available on their website for worship leaders and musicians to use freely.  

All Sons & Daughters has also released four EPs, or mini albums:  Brokenness Aside EP No. 1 , Prone To Wander: A Collection of Hymns EP, Reason To Sing and their latest, The Longing, released on September 25, 2012.  

To find out more about All Sons & Daughters visit their website. 

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A native of New Jersey, Denise Trio is a full-time worship leader, mentor, designer, and blogger based out of Fort Lauderdale, FL. She wants to use her voice to inspire others to seek healing and pursue restoration of broken relationships. Follow on her blog Blond Moment of the Day or on Twitter.  

Personal Connection - Jena Fisher

We all have a story to tell! Personal Connection is just one of the ways we share stories here at Circles of Faith. Ordinary women are doing extraordinary things for God. We hope Jena’s story encourages and inspires others to take that next step to what God is calling them to do. 

IN OUR SPOTLIGHT THIS MONTH IS JENA FISHER

Worship Leader, Singer/Songwriter, and Pioneer of the Worship Soul genre

FAITH

Tell us your FAITH story.

I grew up in a Christian home, in my father’s storefront Pentecostal church. Ever since I can remember, God was drawing me closer to Him through songwriting. As early as age seven, I began to develop a relationship with Christ although I didn’t know it at the time. I loved being close to God, talking with Him, journaling my thoughts and, of course, singing to Him. 

It was my father who shaped my faith. His teaching of giving God your best will always be with me. Though he is still alive, this is part of my inheritance—his legacy to me. Dad was very “big” on knowing the Word. He would instruct me to read Bible stories each day after school and then share with him what I learned. I hope to instill that same fervor for God in my children. 

I went through a phase, like many children raised in Christian homes, when I lost my faith. During college, I was so far away from God and wasn’t sure how to get back to Him. After graduation, I moved to New Jersey from Wisconsin and stumbled upon the church I now attend. It was my experience there that led me back to God and a process of healing and discovery began that is ongoing today.

Faith has played a major role in the decisions I make in life. It was only through faith and God's leading that, after ten years as a high school history teacher, I was able to take a step and leave teaching to stay at home with my newborn daughter. It was that step that opened the door to God's purpose for my life.  

LIFE

What does LIFE look like for you?

My family encompasses so much of who I am. My husband Ron and I are just two people on the love roller coaster! Our two daughters Olivia and Nia energize our lives. Ron’s and my relationship is shaped by our love for God and worship, our passion for fitness, and love of laughter. Laughter has helped us to remain sane even when times are tough. We love sharing a big bowl of popcorn and watching a funny movie. As simple as it may seem, sharing humor with someone means a lot.

An important part of our relationship is learning to balance parenting in the 21st century! Ron is an excellent caregiver to our girls—his love is huge for them and he almost never seems stressed by them. His supportive and caring personality really helps to keep me balanced. We are working as a team more than ever. Nearly seven years into our marriage, we have truly begun to build a rhythm for our lives.

While I am not doing any one thing full time, I am doing a mixture of things that are fulfilling to me. The purposeful choices I've made make it possible to focus on my desire to create and minister in song as a volunteer worship leader in my church. I’ve also been able to pursue my passion for fitness. I currently teach classes, and do personal training at my gym, while working towards my personal training certification. In addition, I work part-time at Lululemon, a yoga store and athletic clothing retailer. 

COMMUNITY

How does community inspire your life?

My church family is a big part of fostering my faith. There are people in my life who have mentored me…especially women in our church. They have really helped me to come into my own. They have helped me grow tremendously as a mom, a women in ministry, a wife, and as a person. There women have taken time to pour into me and help me to see myself clearly, always pointing me toward God. I am so grateful for their influence in my life. I hope to be a mentor to young women some day too and make the same investment others have made in me. 

Community boils down to investing in people and allowing people to invest in you. Small groups play a big role in our life. One of the things my husband and I love to do is host LIFE group (small group) in our home. Our group is diverse, fun, and we truly feel valued by them. 

God has also blessed me with a core group of friends and I am energized when we laugh together—again, laughter is key to me!

The friends I’ve made at church, work, and the gym are all amazing women! I love to get people together and help facilitate relationships by having little gatherings. Not only do I get to connect with my friends, but they can connect to each other too. 

Lululemon is not just a place I work, it has become a community of sorts for me as well. I love being a part of what they are doing. Their focus includes investing in the development of their employees not just in the area of fitness but personal purpose development through goal coaching sessions and vision casting. Lululemon has allowed me to utilize my skill of connecting to other women, having real conversations about fitness, life, and purpose. I am able to motivate people to do the things that they love.  

INTERSECT

Where and how does the above all come together for you?

Ever since I was a little girl, I wanted to inspire others through music. I am blessed to have that dream come true by creating authentic worship music for others to connect with God and be inspired to live out their lives purposefully. 

I am in the process of finishing my recording for congregational worship. I can’t wait to see how God uses these songs to help people connect with Him. My hope is that these songs will be used in the lives of congregations across the nation!

In 2009, after I had my first child, I decided to start recording some of the music I was creating. It was this process that began leading me to my true call. Right before a recording session for my album entitled Where I Belong, I was talking with a friend from church. I shared with her the things that were in my heart--a desire to connect others to God through worship in a fresh way. It was then that the song Discovery: Show Me the Way was birthed and my path became clearer.

Since then, I have written two songs, in particular, that I believe will really move people into the presence of God. I am producing them as an independent artist, meaning that I am not signed to any label. My hope is that these songs, especially Have Mercy and Lord You Are, will touch many. My desire is to break past racial, cultural, and denominational barriers through my music. My prayer is that my music speaks to people from all backgrounds!

NEXT ROUND

I hope God will continue to use me in worship and worship ministry development—praying that I can know his heart for me in each season of life.

Jena recently teamed up with Kickstarter to successfully fund her dream to record the two songs she has written, Have Mercy and Lord You Are. Here is the video of her sharing with others her passion for what she is doing.     

Let us know what your favorite worship song is in the comments HERE and be entered to win a MP3 download of Jena's song Discovery. 

You can follow Jena on Twitter at @jenaworshipsoul